Peta Dukes

relational recovery drawing on experiences from somatic, trauma, and IFS perspectives

Consultation

DISCOVER YOUR

Sovereignty

Be supported on your path to inner harmony

Find out what nervous-system dysregulation is and how it affects you

Co-author your recovery path to move beyond your emotional dysregulation

Packages designed to suit your needs (no one-size fits all)

BOOK YOUR

RECOVERY APPOINTMENT

Learn to cultivate inner safety and move beyond guilt and shame

Have you experienced any of the following?

  • Childhood trauma
  • A dysfunctional family system
  • A complicated relationship with your parents
  • Difficulty with boundaries
  • Codependency
  • Love addiction
  • Disordered eating
  • Substance abuse
  • Wanting to create profound change but not managing to get started
  • Feeling like you’ve plateaued in your conscious journey

If you have, you’re not broken

These polarizing experiences are normal survival responses to the complicated world that we navigate from birth. I’m here to tell you there is a gentle path to shifting how you relate to yourself and others, without shame or judgement.

Why are we struggling?

We live in a world that is designed to profit off the parts of us that don’t feel good enough, while telling us that masking our pain is essential to look like we have it all together. All our social conditioning constrains us from stepping outside the box and living from our authentic selves. Our childhood survival responses, meant to align us with our caregivers, leave us vulnerable to being manipulated by systems that profit from our lack of self-worth. We don’t learn to source our value from within and are stuck in loops that look for validation in places that we will never find it. This all leaves us disconnected from ourselves, others and nature.

What is childhood trauma really?

Gabor Maté notes that there are two types of childhood trauma; the kind that comes from recognized neglect and abuse and the kind that comes from emotional deprivation or early disconnection.

We all come into the world with two competing survival needs. The need for full authentic expression of ourselves and the need for attachment to our primary caregivers. The attachment need always wins because the child knows subconsciously that it can’t survive without its parents.

When we express our feelings fully, we learn that our caregivers can’t handle the intensity of our emotions as they are triggered into their own emotional protective responses. Depending on their conditioning, they either get angry or simply ignore us. While each of our sets of circumstances are unique, the result is the same.

We learn that being our full authentic selves, expressing what we feel fully, is not ok, and we learn to suppress ourselves (enter the guilt and shame mechanism).

This response is adaptive in childhood; however, in adulthood it leaves us, at best, conflicted and, at worst, depressed and unable to affect change in our lives.

HOW I RELATE TO THE HUMAN CONDITION

relational recovery

I help women and men to understand themselves, create inner safety and take responsibility for their own inner peace and happiness, allowing them to achieve better emotional regulation and eventually create profound transformation in their lives.

When you relate with me, you’ll learn to release stored survival stress, creating inner harmony at a pace that doesn’t overwhelm you. You’ll begin to reflect and be more introspective, identify your unconscious patterns and recognise and care for the parts of you that need to be heard. You’ll also explore the effect of these patterns, coping mechanisms and behaviours on yourself and those around you so that you can begin to be more at choice about which parts of you show up in the world.

REQUEST BOOKING

HI

My name is Peta

My lifetime search for emotional regulation has given me an experiential understanding of the intricate interconnectedness of body and mind. My relating is deeply informed by the groundbreaking work of pioneers in the somatic, trauma, and IFS perspectives that I have integrated into my life.

This allows me to offer an holistic approach that addresses the inseparable physical, emotional and spiritual aspects of trauma, nervous system dysregulation, and recovery.

Growing up in a dysfunctional family, I have battled with and navigated the complexities of developmental trauma, including anxiety, depression, and addiction. This lived experience has fuelled my passionate pursuit of inner peace and emotional regulation, leaving me with invaluable empathy and insight into the challenges faced by those I support.

My personal journey has culminated in the creation of a relational way of being that empowers the men and women I hold space for to understand and overcome the physiological, mental and emotional effects of childhood and other trauma. I am dedicated to educating and guiding those I relate with to navigate their despair, understand themselves, and cultivate a sense of calm and stability. My relating is marked by compassion, understanding, and a deep commitment to lasting healing and resilience.

MY GUIDING PRINCIPLE

All parts are welcome

“When you go out into the woods, and you look at trees, you see all these different trees. And some of them are bent, and some of them are straight, and some of them are evergreens, and some of them are whatever. And you look at the tree and you allow it. You see why it is the way it is. You sort of understand that it didn’t get enough light, and so it turned that way. And you don’t get all emotional about it. You just allow it. You appreciate the tree.

The minute you get near humans, you lose all that. And you are constantly saying ‘You are too this, or I’m too this.’ That judgment mind comes in. And so I practice turning people into trees. Which means appreciating them just the way they are.” ~ Ram Dass

Together we’ll remember your magnificence and you'll learn how to value, love and accept all the parts of yourself (even the part that judges), just the way they are.

REQUEST BOOKING
I approached Peta initially regarding the anger I was experiencing, which was affecting my family, health and work very negatively. After the first five sessions I was able to set healthy boundaries and had a deeper understanding of why I was experiencing these emotions. Four months passed quickly, during which we uncovered childhood trauma that I didn’t realize was still affecting my life. Peta not only held space for me through the emotional memories I could recall in our sessions, but also taught me how to recognize when they are triggered and how I can heal myself. I experienced Peta as a kind, compassionate and thoughtful healer and teacher with vast knowledge of the soul. This is by far the greatest investment I have made in my spiritual, emotional and creative development and it has been a great privilege.
Carla GradwellArchitectural and Structural Drafter / 3D Artist
“I worked with Peta Dukes as a recovery coach over a period of about 6 months with several specific goals in mind. I was preparing for a major surgery and wanted to make sure that I had dealt with childhood trauma which might be stirred up as part of the recovery process. In addition to working on this specific issue, I benefited tremendously from the work I did with Peta around managing daily stress, healing psychosomatic muscular pain and practicing new behaviors when unhealthy coping strategies popped up. I highly recommend working with Peta, whether you've got short-term goals in mind or need to address deep trauma issues.”
Lisa HendersonPodcaster, USA
“Peta has been my Recovery Coach, confidant and mentor for a few months now and I cannot recommend her more. She brings an immense amount of wisdom, compassion and true care into the therapy space. Therapists of her quality are few and far between. With nearly 12 years on my own recovery journey, I didn't think there was that much scope for growth anymore. Peta gently and kindly unearths what needs to be scrutinised and then holds beautiful space for me while I do the work and grow beyond my expectations. I trust Peta with my life and those of others I care for. I cannot recommend her enough.”
Freddie van RensburgSpecialist Wellness Counsellor, South Africa
“Six sessions flew by! I was skeptical at first – but have continued to experience the benefits of our coaching. I am amazed at how my critical inner voice has gone from 100000% right down to 10%.

Thank you for your wisdom and guidance. Looking forward to booking more sessions in the future.”
Melissa PMedia Buyer, South Africa
Peta has been coaching me around inner child work for the last couple of months. It has been a profound and sometimes challenging journey. I have been confronted with much pain and it caused me intense feelings of fear and bouts of anxiety. Peta has held me in this space with love and kept me grounded at all times.. She has a very compassionate and nurturing approach to her work. I find her genuine and authentic. I am not the easiest of people to coach and somewhat resistant, but with Peta the conversation just flowed and I felt totally at ease and safe in this space. I highly recommend Peta as she shared tools I can use and techniques to help me through the worst times that will carry me into the future. Well worth the investment.
Nikki EdwardsProfessional Recovery Coach (CPRC)
The only true way to lead another is to have walked the journey first ourselves. Peta's authority, grace and insight as a mentor, teacher and healer on the path to recovery and wholeness has been hard won. I salute her and truly admire and am grateful for her courage, her wisdom, her compassion and her strength. Peta is a woman who walks her talk and whose sharp mind, bright wit and earnest care has been a shining light for me on my own healing journey. Peta's depth of understanding of the elegant and powerful healing resource of Internal Family Systems, and her ability to impart it's wisdom to others, both in a group format and one on one, is brilliant. She holds the space with clarity and with both power and humility. Doing this work with Peta has been a deep and meaningful gift to me and has catalysed powerful healing in my life.
Sylve SandallsBodywork and energy healing practitioner, South Africa.
I love the way Peta uses her own experiences to explain so eloquently, bravely and compassionately, how self-parenting equals loving yourself unconditionally and that putting your needs first is the opposite of being selfish. I am finding it so much easier to be compassionate and mature towards others having done the inner work of healing and loving my own inner parts.
Narelle PioArtist
The journey of understanding who I am, has taken me along many paths of self-discovery. This course with Peta has opened me to a kinder reflection, a deeper understanding of what my triggers have represented, and given me the tools to manage myself in times of inner conflict. The group dynamic of women committed to healing these wounds has been invaluable. I support her work with the deepest of gratitude for what it has brought to my life.💜
Deborah ProsserFacilitator and owner of Rest and Digest Wellness Haven
I had the privilege of attending Peta's ten-week course, and it was truly transformative. Peta's bravery and openness in sharing her own vulnerable stories created a safe space for all of us to do the same. Her ability to hold such a nurturing environment allowed me to confront and release deep-seated childhood traumas. Each session felt like a puzzle piece, gradually coming together to form a powerful, healing picture. I am immensely grateful for this experience, and I would eagerly join another workshop facilitated by Peta in the future.
Chelsea WadeIllustrator & Designer
Working with Peta has honestly given me my life back. It’s difficult to put into words the depth of gratitude and appreciation I have for her and the impact she’s had on my life. The way she shows up, the work she does, and the care she brings has changed my life as well as the lives of those around me. I now have so much more capacity to deal with what life brings, and to hold space for the people I love. The past version of me simply didn't have the capacity, but doing the work on myself has rippled out into all areas of my life. Peta is a wealth of knowledge, but what makes her truly exceptional is the combination of her intellect, lived experience, and the fact that she has done (and continues to do) the work herself. That depth is felt in every session. When I started, I genuinely felt like no one could help me - like there wasn’t enough time in the world to unpack everything that had built up, leaving me completely incapacitated and overwhelmed by trauma. I now know that wasn’t true. I honestly couldn’t have found a better person to work with. I would highly recommend Peta to anyone struggling in any area of their life. She is one of the most versatile, grounded, and impactful people I’ve ever met.
Jade KittnerEntrepreneur
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Contact Me

  • Kloof, KZN